Recently I spoke about my ’16 expert hacks to double your IVF success rate’ with our favourite magazine, RSVP. Why do some people sail through IVF and achieve pregnancy more easily?
With 30 years helping my clients build their families, I’m sharing my 10 trusted hacks to help you get pregnant with fertility treatment.Part of this post – with just 10 hacks – originally appeared in RSVP – where I’m always delighted to contribute and keep the fertility convo going.A new study shows couples overestimate their chance of getting pregnant with IVF treatment – men exaggerate the chances more than women. (ESHRE 2020)I love to see couples actively prepare for IVF success, rather than stumbling in and learning the hard way.Here’s what couples agree they wish they’d known before they got started…
An ounce of preparation is worth a pound of cure.
Even with IVF you still need a healthy egg and a healthy sperm to achieve fertilisation. IVF provides the introduction service for sperm and eggs, and ensures up to a year’s supply of eggs are available for fertilisation.
Two out of three IVF cycles fail in this wonderful but inexact science – a devastating loss for intending parents. The physical, emotional and financial fall-out is enormous. Resesarch shows couples who are fully prepared can double their chances of success on the first round, and reduce risk of depression. I find an integrative approach works well for clients. Fertility is a systemic issue for both partners, and here’s how you learn to be more in control of yours.
Become your own project manager.
Set up an Excel document to maintain clear records of investigations, treatments, medication protocols, reactions, surgery, and results. Include dates and times of visits and a synopsis of what was said. This is an important reference to track your progress on this cycle, to brief a new clinic, or should any mishaps occur.
Clinic liaison.
Find out your clinic’s policy on how they give information updates. There is usually one team member who funnels info, and fields questions.
Are there mutually arranged times to suit you, or pot-luck calls during your working day? What about support over weekends and holidays? Keep the liaison number handy in both your phones. Note what the procedure in case of ovarian hyperstimulation OHSS or miscarriage.
Decide who’s in.
Who needs to know you are having IVF? Your boss, line manager, colleagues, your mum, his mum, sisters, girlfriends? You can’t unshare this or swear too many folk to secrecy. A good filter to apply is “Will they be helpful and is it really necessary?” Are you prepared for questions, suggestions and supplying ongoing updates? Everyone will want updates so choose one town crier!
Time out.
If you can organise it at work and get time off sorted for clinic visits. Or get your GP or consultant to sign you off for a few days after egg retrieval and embryo transfer. Fertility meds affect people differently, especially on a first round. An option to rest and recover is a sensible back-up plan – and hopefully you don’t need to use it.
List the medications.
That huge pack of meds now occupying your fridge is daunting initially.
Get familiar with your meds, dosages, timings and how to take them. Learn to self-inject gently and painlessly if your partner baulks at the idea. Doing your injections gives them a way to feel part of the process.
Check in with your doctor if you’re taking otc suplements, or medicinal herbs – they can interfere with fertility pharmaceuticals.
Chart which meds are taken and when they’re due. Stick to the timings and set reminders on your phone.
Keep enough meds in stock so you don’t run out.
Focus.
Focus on ‘being in treatment’, and doing the minimum. Your body is doing a year’s worth of ovulating in a month. This is no time for a sourdough challenge or a house move. Unless you have to…
IVF is exhausting and the meds can play havoc with your moods and well being. Be as gentle on yourself as you’d be with a friend. Meet up to talk
about something else on Zoom, or socially distance as guided to enjoy a break from it all. Cherry-pick who you spend time with. Limit your exposure to anything stressy that derails your mood.
Fertility in mind.
Mindset is key to navigating IVF and achieving pregnancy. I combine lifestyle and hypnotherapy to get clients into the fertility zone and optimise the benefits of treatment. Research by Dr. Ali Domar and others show the measurable benefits of mind/body sessions to double the odds of IVF success. My preconception protocol is designed to optimise chances of conceiving, either naturally or with IVF. This is an individually tailored process for individual needs. We look at lifestule and nutrition adjustments, toxin removal, sleep hygiene and mind/body care.
‘Hypnosis has been known for many years for producing central relaxation, and has even been used before surgical interventions to calm patients’ – Prof. Eliahu Levitas. If Israeli professor Eliahu Levitas has his way, women undergoing IVF treatment will all have the benefit of a hypnotist at their bedside.’
According to Levitas’s team from Soroka Hospital in Beersheva, hypnosis can double the success of IVF treatment. Levitas’s study of 185 women found that 28% of women in the group who were hypnotized became pregnant, compared with 14% of those who were not.
Sometimes people forget to focus on healthy eggs and sperm for IVF to work – and to get pregnancy ready. Medical treatment is augmented with a fertility care program.
Belgian research at this year’s European Society of Human Reproduction and Embryology conference reveals that clinics give ball-park figures of success for younger patients. Patients simply don’t believe it applies to them – their cognitive bias kicks in, and they expect double the chance of pregnancy given by their clinic. The study urges clinics to provide more realistic stats to manage expectations and reduce the shock of failed cycles.
Live a little.
Remember you’ve got this far and you’re getting ready for pregnancy. Enjoy some stuff you won’t have a chance to do once your baby arrives. Share leisurely breakfasts in bed, baths together, a mutual massage, a bit of pampering, reading a whole magazine. Imagine you’re getting ready to be parents now. It’s all to easy to forget that when you feel like a science project, pin-cushioned full of medications. Doing this helps you focus outside of your own worries and fears.
Eat like a mama and papa.
Delicious healthy food nourishes you to give your baby the best start in life – and to help you have a healthy pregnancy.
Think of Med style eating – sans a bread overload! Loads of seasonal veggies and fruit, plenty of fish, meat and chicken for nutrient-dense goodness.
Did I mention fish? Please eat more fresh or frozen whole fish and seaweed, too. As an island nation here in Ireland we eat too little of these iodine-filled foods that fuel the thyroid gland. Eggs are also a powerhouse of nutrients for growing babies.
Organise food.
You may not feel up for cooking up a storm during fertility treatment. Tiredness, aches and bloating take their toll. And did anyone mention constipation?
Pears, prunes and probiotics are your friends. Fermented foods, like the humble sauerkraut, and loads of fibre feed your gut microbiome. Ditch the Nutribullet and eat your fruit as nature intended.
Have a freezer full of great healthy meals so you’re not tempted to ready-made or take-out. How about asking friends and family to drop around a signature dish, instead of the chocolate fingers?
Set up an online grocery order to keep the good stuff coming and avoid comfort eating crap – you’ll be glad you did.
Watch your weight. Ben and Gerry’s is not your friend. You can rack up over a stone during IVF , so no comfort food, or junk food – you’re getting prepped for healthy parenthood. Save the treats for when you get a ‘BFP’ (big fat positive). Piling on pounds is easy, and trying to shed this resistant type of weight adds to the misery of a failed cycle.
Caffeine withdrawal.
Diehard caffeine freaks tell me that giving up coffee while you are trying to conceive is better done well in advance of starting treatment. That extra touch of caffeine-withdrawal grumpiness might disturb your usual zen state when blended with the hormone-emotion overload.
Prenatal vitamins.
Folic Acid, or its natural step-cousin-twice-removed, Folate, along with CoEnzyme Q10 and Omega-3s help improve egg quality.
Iron is a staple to keep energy levels up while L-Arginine preps a welcoming thick uterine lining for implantation. Avoid supermarket supplements – you get the quality you pay for. A good supplement covers all these bases and then some and I believe the investment is non-negotiable for fertility treatment success.
Build your support network.
Folk love to help, and to feel included – when they know what you want. Do you want company on a clinic visit if your partner can’t make it? Long phone chats? Your Other Half is new to the fertility treatment gig and may feel helpless, or sidelined.
Dress for the occasion.
The reality of bloating, sweating and actual weight gain – and the stripping for scans – brings a whole new appreciation for the floaty cottons of M & S.Consider a brief affair with elastic waistbands, cashmere or fleece socks and wraps. Stay warm to support hormones and let soft layers keep you cosy during clinic visits.
Sleep routine.
‘Sleep Debt’ studies show over 70% of people don’t take enough sleep. Payback time for sleep debt is now, so ensure you take the time to get a proper night’s sleep.
Your partner needs plenty of good quality sleep to produce healthy sperm – as well as for impending parenthood.
Forget being passive about sleep, hoping for a good night. You need to plan a sleep habit menu that benefits your fertility and well-being.
Getting sleep back on track is part of my sessions with IVF patients – hypnotherapy is fast and effective.
The waiting game.
IVF is a waiting game of so many hurdles, ratcheting up stress levels. Women continuously ask themselves: Will it work? How many eggs are maturing? How many fertilised? Will they make it to transfer? What are my hormone levels? Is my uterine lining thick enough?
Men fell the stress too, and may react differently. The toll of IVF on mental health is underestimated by most couples. Most fertility clinics bow out after the pregnancy test at the end of the 2-week wait, whether it’s a pregnancy or a failed cycle.
Women are more at risk of post-natal depression after IVF pregnancies, while men’s post-natal depression is only recently recognised thanks to the work of Mark Williams and the NHS.
How do I help?
As well as advising and supporting couples to prep for IVF, I guide them every step of the way. Family and freiends may be too close, or don’t understand what IVF entails. And no, you don’t have to ‘think positive’ to achieve pregnancy. Superstitious thinking: ” I mustn’t jinx my chances with negative thoughts is not accurate. I help my clients get their fertility ducks in a row, by encouraging balance, reducing anxiety and opening discussion.
Having a baby doesn’t always erase the anxiety of infertility or a previous failed cycle so it’s good to have the support you need to ease you into a happy pregnancy. I use hypnotherapy and EMDR therapy to reduce anxiety, quickly and easily.
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